Labor Day Randomness

Today is Labor Day in the states hence it’s a holiday. Some colleagues set out on a grand out of town vacation this long weekend but not me. My friend Erwin once tweeted “There are things we are asked to live without. I have my list, you have yours.” I favorited this because it rings true. There are so many things to do but with limited time and resources, that if I was going to arrange my priorities, travel and  going out would be those that I would give up without second guessing. I’m at this point where I have accepted that I would need to make sacrifices for the things I value as most important. I have so many unread ebooks, unseen movies and unheard of music that today I would just be happy to house-cation and consume them over too much caffeine. Okay.  That’s pathetic, nerdy and pretentious. 

Actually last Saturday night, Karen and I were supposed to watch Wilson’s band play next town (and I said I gave up going out). It just hit me when he was not responding to my text that I got the dates mixed up. He invited us for August 30 and that Saturday night was already the 31st. It figures why he texted Friday night asking where I was and when I replied saying I was at work, I did not hear from him since. Naisip ko, maybe it’s normal to mixed up the dates like that, but then I asked, if I like Wilson a bit more would that have happened? If anything, maybe I just agreed to go because I wanted to do something new with Karen. Like I wanted for us to meet new people and share an adventure together. It’s one of those things you have to experience because it doesn’t happen all the time. I’m talking about being the date of the bass player who’s got long hair and tattoos on both arms. I know, such profound taste in men (he skateboards too). Well, I screwed up so the closest thing I got to being that kind of girl is being invited to come, that’s it.

I finished reading The Fault in Our Stars by John Green this morning. It was kind of okay halfway through but towards the end I couldn’t stop. I am not a big novel reader so it was a deal that I finished one in less than 24 hrs. It did not laugh out loud or pause to say “OMG ang ganda nito” like I did reading Blue Like Jazz but it sure made me cry. I think that’s what the book wanted to accomplish, yung steady ka lang nagbabasa pero nadadala ka na pala.  It is a sad book I tell you, in a way that isn’t forced. I felt a bit envious of Hazel for having found the love of her life at 16.  To think they both have cancer which is something to pity and this is just fiction, but it made me feel that. That’s how believable it was to me. Except for the killer quotes, like who talks like that in real life? Oh well, maybe people who are sick, dying and are in love. Reading this book also made me remember how I responded to BLJ and I realized that I really liked the latter for what it is, not just because I learned it from this guy who I was sort of getting to know back then.

Hamartia. A striking word or idea I read in A Fault in Our Stars. Quoting from the book, it is like, "The whole thing where a boy who is not unattractive or unintelligent or seemingly in any way unacceptable stares at me and points out incorrect uses of literality and compares me to actresses and asks me to watch a movie at his house. But of course there is always a hamartia and yours is that [cigarette] oh, my God, even though you HAD FREAKING CANCER you give money to a company in exchange for the chance to acquire YET MORE CANCER." It’s a fatal flaw that ruins the whole thing, like that shiny red balloon in a Barbie's Cradle song. I totally get this. I did not know there was a word for it. Of course no one is perfect but it becomes disappointing when everything is great...and then this. Okay, how arrogant of me to be talking about other people’s flaws like I don’t have one. Afterall, isa akong malaking hamartia na nagkaroon ng hininga at naging tao. I have so many flaws that if there is one good thing about me, there should be a new word invented for that. Imagine someone saying, "You are so wrong in so many different levels but this one great thing about you makes you right." Hanep! Hahaha. 

On a redeeming note, I learned that true love is so powerful it overlooks the hamartia. More on this in my future posts maybe.

Alright, so how else did I spend my Labor Day? I watched V for Vendetta which is kind of spooky because in the book, Augustus suggests that Hazel watch it and I was like, I just saw that last night! I also saw Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind again. I cooked Spanish Omelet, half of which was consumed by our dogs and they loved it! I listened to one of those Relevant podcast episodes. I read a bit about 30 Seconds to Mars’ 30 million lawsuit. I slept through a playlist of indie songs. I had a special bath in generous amount of conditioner and body scrub, it was great! ( I realized later that any regular shower can be epic for anyone who I stinks like I did.) I actually want more free days to do the same stuff. Except for my annoying neighbor, this Labor Day weekend wasn’t so bad.