I went to VCF Fort instead of Galleria last Sunday because I had plans to see Cinemanila in Market Market after the service.
Dumating ako ng 7:30pm, thinking ang aabutan ko na lang ay ang message but still feeling okay with it because that Sunday, I was only after the attendance. I then learned that the service was closing but there is still one service left at 8pm. Okay, good, I can complete the service, I thought, but I knew I might be late for the movies. I was going to see it with two guy friends, and I was kind of thrilled because it's the closest thing to having a date on a weekend after a long time.
Date na date na talaga 'ko. Kailangan dalawa sabay. Haha.
So I went in, and while waiting for the service to start, I felt like asking God to say something to me. I said, "God, speak to me through this. I want to hear you." But really, I was saying, "God, I got all the way over here. I was supposed to be at the mall watching movies right now, but I chose this first. So make this worthwhile by atleast revealing something to me".
We planned to see any film showing at 9pm because one of the guys was working late on a Sunday. As it turned out, he still couldn't make it, the service ended at 9:30, so the other guy just watched the film alone. Ang aming ending? Eh di wala. Haha.
So I went to the mall after anyway, checked out the movies, then left and went for a walk in High Street. After a while, I had to leave to go back to the mall, but I promised to myself that I will go back there one day and spend hours in Fully Booked for inspiration. Medyo malakas ang artsy vibe sa lugar na yun and I like it.
I went back to the mall to see the last screening. I was convincing myself that I was there for arts sake. So may kasama o wala, I was gonna see a festival film. And I was really committed to it, promise, kaso nalaman ko na medyo Korean horror ata yung palabas. Hindi ko naman siguro kailangang gawin sa sarili ko iyon para lang patunayan ang pagmamahal ko sa sining. So, naisip ko, mas masisiyahan ata ako kung yung P150 kong pangsine eh wawaldasin ko na lang sa Starbucks.
I was used to being alone. In fact, I'm comfortable with it. But that night, man, I was lonely. Beyond words. Maybe because naka-set na ang mind ko na that night, I was gonna be with these guys, but I ended up with neither one. The worst part? I dressed up a little and powdered my nose! Tapos hindi nila nakita? What a shame! Haha.
On normal days, that would have sucked. Well, it still does. But I remember how I felt walking in the dark and empty mall at 11:00pm. That was awful, but inside I was calm. Why? In my head I was hearing what I took from church that night. The series ongoing was about finance and stewardship, but when out of the blue the pastor said something about waiting, timing and giving up, I knew that when I asked God to speak to me that night, that was Him, speaking to me through those words.
When I got home, I was supposed to be grouchy and tired, but I was surprisingly in a good mood. When I washed my face and looked in the mirror, nakita kong gulo-gulo pala ang buhok ko dahil hinangin sa tricyle, but my face was glowing, I was...beautiful. Chos. Haha. Sayang hindi nila ako nakita.
So it wasn't really a bad night. If I had to go all the way to the Fort to be encouraged like that, it was worth it.
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