On Getting Healed

I had this pimple problem. Ever since 2nd year college, my face continues to break out. Its genes I know. Si nanay was pimple prone and tatay has oily skin.
I always had been picking my zits. I never learn.But the week of May 14-25, 2007, I had this horrible experience with it, which I guess turned out to be for the better naman. I picked a small zit, at nainfect ito, giving me a huge, red, very obvious mark sa cheek ko, just beside my nose. I was so embarassed. I couldnt go out. Whenever I look at it in the mirror, totoo, I felt like passing out. I couldnt forgive what I'd done to myself. And I noticed, iyon na lang ng iyon ang napapansin ko. I couldnt do anything else. And I knew that's not right. So I prayed to God for healing. Maybe not just for the pimple but for a deeper wound in me. Always before, and maybe until today, I had always been very conscious about how I look. Whenever I look in the mirror, I am not satisfied with what i see. I felt I would be important and valuable if I look better. So I was focusing on it, and always feeling disappointed. Hindi ko na naisip that there are other things I can do too.And I had kept me from reaching my maximum potential.
So one night I prayed, crying, sabi ko God, I need to be healed from this. And I wrote out my thoughts:
WHY SHOULD I BE HEALED GOD?1. It's worth my self-confidence. And I need to be confident so I can serve God.2. It's making me unproductive, making me waste so much time and that is ungodly.3. Robbing the joy in me. Jesus came that I may have life and have it in its fullness.
WHAT AM I LEARNING FROM THIS?1. Never to touch my face again. The consequences are horrible.2. Not take matters into my own hand. 3. I am a gifted, talented, intelligent person being destroyed by this! I have to breakthrough, I have so much potential.4. If I'm well (at the time of writing, my cheek was red), I will do my best and make the most of myself.5. Contrary to thinking I can do little, now, I know I can do so much!6. My life is so much valuable to be wasted by this. If I have to spend so much to get my "life" back, it is worth it!7. There are so many hurting and sick people out there, like me, suffering from something worse than a pimple. Some of them even hurting physically! I know how they feel now. To hurt inside and to lose confidence, and to lose hope and not to want to live anymore. 8. If I have a big problem, I turn to God. But I take charge of a tiny little pimple, which then turns out to be my biggest problem. I learn to consult God in even the slightest issue. I had bigger problems than having a zit, pero I seeked God, and came out victorious. Funny, I was so defeated by a pimple. Kasi nga, it hit me where it hurts the most: MY FACE, MYSELF, AND MY HUNGER FOR APPROVAL. I am guilty of Idolatry and my golden idol is myself.
As embarassing as it is, I wrote this out so I will never forget the lesson I learned from that experience. I am feeling better now. But I have gone through this for a long time, and I know I am still in the process of total healing. But I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.